Monday, December 26, 2016

HELLO INTERNET HATES STAR WARS

OK, that might not be true, but Hello Internet really did not like the movie Rogue One, and I need to make sure that everyone in the world knows that I did not appreciate this episode of Hello Internet just about as much as they did not appreciate the movie. They've let me down just as much as they say Rogue One let them down. I really did not leave this episode with a good feeling. They really missed the mark here.


Perhaps they should stick to what they know? I don't know - maybe that's just how movies work. People like them and people don't like them.

It's also pretty evident that I disagree with EVERY SINGLE THING that they said about the movie in their review of the film.

The ONLY thing that I actually AGREE with them on is this: the mind slug thing did not need to be there. Everything else was where it belonged.

This post is continued beneath this Twitter rant I went on complaining about the episode:


Why? Why is this movie the way it is? Why did CGP Grey and I both have the same thought as the Star Destroyers were crashing into the shield surrounding the palm tree planet? BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT WE WERE SUPPOSED TO FEEL.

We were kind of SUPPOSED to hate the Rebels in this movie - not because the Rebels are bad guys - but for a more specifically designed reason. The moral of this story is that War is a bad thing, and it makes even the best of us turn into monsters. This is something that I can totally attest to.

ANECDOTE TIME: There's a story that I don't think I've ever published in word form anywhere.

When I finished One Station Unit Training - that's BCT and AIT taught by the same Drill Sergeants - in 2012 at Fort Leonard Wood,  I came home to find that my sister was now living in the house, and that she was suffering from a paranoid schizophrenic break from reality - which I would later discover was drug-induced.

I knew that she was suffering, so I thought that the best course of action would be to entertain her ideas. She wrote everything she thought down in her journal, which I saw as a sign that she was at least using this experience to learn about the universe and its fullest potentials. I still have no idea how different the world is to someone who suffers from that - I have no empathy for that universe.

Entertaining her twisted reality turned out to be a huge mistake.

Back then I liked to leave every door in the house unlocked.

I was working in my loft at that point on something - I don't really remember what.

My sister knocked on the door, and then just came in anyways. I made sure to install a deadbolt on the door the very next day, because fuck people who knock and just march in anyways.

She was tripping balls - and I was not in a place to entertain the crazy things that were coming out of her mouth. She was talking about people who weren't there, and voices telling her to do shit, and all sorts of nonsense about parallel dimensions and she wasn't making any fucking sense at all. Much like people don't when they are tripping balls on some shit.

She's also a high school dropout, and having conversations with her on a normal day are hard for me.

I've always hated people who are not lucid in their speech.

I was starting to get driven to an abyss that I wasn't able to come back from. I came down from my loft and started trying to convince my sister that the voices were not real. That everything was in her head. She just kept charging along with all the crazy person shit.

I had just graduated Basic Combat Training and Combat Engineering School and I was built out of wood - I was going to this place where only fighters know. This place that lives deep inside all of us that is the physical manefestation of all of our rage - and my sister was becoming the enemy.

She wasn't my sister anymore.

She was the enemy.

I had to fight the enemy. I was shouting at her that the voices weren't real and she was matching my shouts.

That's when I grabbed her and put her in a chokehold. I was choking my own sister.

And I might have actually killed her if it were not for my father who was walking by the window to my room just at the right moment. He came into the room and confronted me.

That's when I realized that I had this evil thing inside of me that had been there the whole time - this potential to do terrible things. The worst things. I am afraid of myself sometimes.

And although I am at least thirty pounds heavier and many waste sizes - that thing still exists inside of me - and in every single person on this planet. In that moment, I became a cynic.

For my sister - the insanity was drug induced, but it was still an insanity. For me, the insanity was induced by combat training, but it's still an insanity that is there forever - something that I have to keep in check constantly.

If it weren't for that - I don't think I would have been so attached to Rogue One. But that happened to me. That happened to my sister. And my father has also had his fair share of insanity over the seven decades of his life.

Rogue One makes perfect sense to me.

That's all I'm saying.


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